I absolutely know that there are so many worse things than what the last few years have held for us and especially for a little chicklet in our family. However, like a friend once told me, God's grace is polka-dot grace. It's big enough to cover our little polka-dots or big polka-dots--no matter if our polka dots are big to some people or small to some people, they're big to us. He meets us where we are, just where we need Him.
We all pray for healthy children and wouldn't choose for anything at all to be "wrong" with them. Sometimes they're made a little different than we would have planned, but they're perfect as God created them to be. He made them for His purpose under Heaven. Sometimes we don't see the purpose, and sometimes we're granted a slight window into how what we're given can in turn help someone else in their journey. Our oldest has Hypoglycemia and a heart murmur and courageously battles the former daily. We still have a lot to learn and hurdles to climb with the side effects she has. Our newest addition is such a joy, and so far besides allergies has no problems, thankfully. I can't call him a "chicklet" since he's a boy and haven't figured out quite yet what I'll call him. He's such an additional joy to our family, especially after our miscarriage last year. That's another blog post about God's grace and hope. I haven't been able to sit down and write it yet. Our little chicklet was born with a right-fourth nerve palsy in her right eye. My story today is about her.
We noticed at about 8-months old that her little right eye would go straight up in her head. She was delayed in crawling and delayed in walking. Some told us that if we'd put her down long enough, she'd learn. :-) When she tried to look at us, she thought she was, but was actually looking to the side of us. We went to one doctor who told us "she was compensating". Thankfully, our journey sent us to Dr. Eric Packwood in Fort Worth via a friend and optometrist from my hometown. We saw him for the first time when she was 11-months old. He told us on that first visit that we were some of the few parents he talked surgery to on the first visit. He also then said, "She will not walk until she has surgery." Those are certainly words that a mommy and daddy don't want to hear. We wouldn't have chosen that for her. Her little brain and eyes couldn't coordinate. By the time she had the first surgery at 14-months old, the left eye had started doing the same thing. One month and ten days following her first surgery, SHE WALKED! Since that time, she's been through patching for hours at a time, multiple pairs of glasses, and two additional surgeries. During each of these surgeries, her little tiny eye muscles were cut and readjusted in the hopes that her brain would recognize her eyes in their new position and that her eyes would be aligned. She has suffered from Right-fourth nerve palsy, Strabismus (misalignment of the eyes), Amblyopia (Where one eye pulls all the way in and the other eye takes over the work and if left untreated an cause an eye to go blind), and Infantile Esotropia (where the eye pulls out to the side). These are all basic laymen definitions the way I understand them, of course! I hope they're the correct definitions. ;-) The patching and glasses were supposed to help with her alignment and worked to pull her eyes to the center. She has no 3-D vision and sees the world as flat (from what we understand) and has had trouble with depth perception. In the beginning, she couldn't walk up ramps, couldn't navigate stairs, and escalators threw her for a loop. Each little step along the way has enabled her to run up ramps, run up stairs unassisted, and most recently can get on escalators by herself. She can even climb "the dinosaur" jungle gym at school, which wouldn't be any problem for most children. She will never be able to see in 3-D, but never has, so she doesn't realize it and doesn't miss it like we would. The good news is, she can do anything that a normal seven-year old can do. She reads, she RUNS, she plays, she DANCES!
Back to the BEST DAY EVER--according to Abby...
We started off as we normally do, in a hurry and rushed for time. We pulled into Dance camp at her dance studio so she could enjoy getting to go to one day of camp. (There are 6 days over 3 weeks, but since it's 40 minutes from home, we could only coordinate the one day.) Her dance teacher talked with us and said, "You probably don't know this, but she won!" We're so grateful to the family and friends who submitted ads for the program for the dance recital in June. The dancer who submits the most ads wins tuition for the next year! Wow! A great start to the day! :-) What a blessing! This in itself would qualify for The Best Day Ever! ;-)
After leaving camp, we headed for our 6-month check-up with Dr. Packwood's office. We had misplaced her glasses and they made "glasses" with different lenses to get her measurements through the appointment. After varying tests and measurements, the words were said, "I'm going to talk to Dr. Packwood to see if he'll agree that she doesn't need glasses anymore." She's been wearing them as needed since January, and 24/7 before that. A bright smile emerged on this little sweetie who has been a trooper through it all. She came back with the good news...No Glasses! Abby was so excited! We had to get cupcakes and cookies to celebrate this milestone.
The kids and I went shopping later, and in the middle of Ross, she looked up with big tears and said, "So this means I'm like everyone else, Momma?" We both cried in the middle of Ross. We love her with her glasses, we love her without, and in the grand scheme of things, having to wear glasses is a totally doable thing to us as parents. However as the only one in her class with glasses, it's a big deal to her. The bigger deal is that although her brain and eyes still don't work together completely as most of ours do, they're aligned at a close-up range and her vision has improved to 20/20 and has stabilized. We'll go back again in 6 months to make sure there have been no changes, but for today, we're going to celebrate!
The following picture is at the desks of the people who work in this office.
If you can't see it clearly, the verse is from Matthew 5:13-16.
13 “You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot.
14 “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. 15 Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. 16 In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven.
Under Salt and Light, the picture says "Let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in Heaven." Through each appointment, Dr. Packwood and his staff have been the Salt and Light to us. They have taken a little baby that couldn't walk because her brain and eyes couldn't coordinate to do so and have used their talents and gifts to enable her to dance through each day and to bring light to others. They have brought light to her, and have enabled her to do the same. She's contagious, silly, fun, strong, brave, sweet, kind and loving and knows how to live each day to the fullest. I'm so thankful that her sister, brother, dad and I got to share this hoped for destination on this journey with her and can't wait to see what's in store for the remainder of her journey.
During our good days and during the ones that feel mundane, may we each find how we can bring the Salt and Light into the lives of those we come in contact with so that others may have their Best Day Ever! So thankful for the ones who didn't hide their light and shared their salt. May we each attempt to do the same.
Life was good today!
Blessings to all!
